Blogger Widgets

Saturday, April 2, 2011

Must Stop This!!!!!!!!!!!!

So me and sc have gotten past the awkward period long long ago and are now very very good friends and almost inseparable...nicknames and all...
And we started talking about handsome guys, and all of a sudden I have 3 shuai ges (actually it's 5 but the other 2 don't actually count coz not classmates in any class)... so I am super 花痴 nowadays but nobody knows or is ever going to know the reason behind this 花痴ing... well I can just say that I really have a reason for doing this, and maybe some things don't matter as much as I make them out to be, and others matter more than they appear to be... much much more.
So anyway, this shuai ge business... it was starting to bring me closer and closer to the point...the point of no turning back... anyway I decided just to stay there, no secrets involved; even though she may think that they Are secrets, but seriously I don't actually give a crap who knows about them. The more the better, in fact. Except for themselves la, later I dunno wan find which hole to crawl into.
But yesterday, due to the menstrual cycle that was about to start again approximately 45 minutes later, my mood was down...really down... and I had such a lot of things on mind especially something (totally unrelated to my love life ok)... So I told the something to her and was so frustrated that I actually went and cried on the bus. But nobody saw la, and hopefully she was not just pretending to be stupid when I told her that I had a cold. zzzz. But... I was moaning to her... asking her opinion... showing her the super super super emo side of myself that I've only ever shown when I'm alone in my room. However, I did explain to her that I thought my period was about to come coz that's the way I always am when it's due... and tadahh it came like a waterfall as soon as I got down from the bus. =.=||
But what I want to say is... I don't want to make her an outlet for my feelings. I Don't Want!!!! And I can give nothing in return (except for translating a random lot of English words to Chinese for her and correcting alllllllllll her grammatical errors in a group assignment), coz when I asked her, she said her mood is always good. =.= Well, I can see that lo. She's the kind of person that I can never imagine being emo, coz she's always so calm. =.= When I asked what she would do if she was really really unhappy (I think that was last month, when my period was about to come again ==), she said she would watch dramas and sleep. walao A.

So anyway, I Must Stop This! Or else the same thing will happen all over again. And I don't want it to, even though she is not really that kind of person. No, not not really; not at all. But... who knows?

No comments: