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Monday, January 31, 2011

Nostalgic!!!

I remember the days when I wanted to stay that age forever and never grow up...
I remember the days when I was waiting impatiently to finish UPSR...
I remember the days when I was desperately wanting to finish secondary school and go to college...
I remember the (last) days when I suddenly didn't want to leave school anymore...
I remember the day when I finished my Bio exam, I was looking forward to the last day of SPM, Chinese...
I remember the days when 11 years olds seemed like grownups to me...
I remember the days when I was still saying my age in "and a half"s...
I remember the days when I could play tapes by myself (and now I can't anymore!)...
I remember the days when Anna Doll was first released from the locker after long years of imprisonment (imagine, that was already 6 years ago!)...
I remember the days of kindergarten...of wearing the uniform which is now different...of the bus with black footprints while it was raining...
I remember my first minor operation... of the horribly strong "strawberry flavoured" anesthetic... of the first time that I tasted and fell in love with Japanese tauhu (yes, in the hospital ==)...and now I pick it every time I go to the mixed rice stall in our cafeteria... And I remember all the horrible and unnecessary pain before that... cotton wool sticking to the wound... cutting it in a clinic... inflammation... and after the operation, thread left inside... =.=||...!!!!
I remember my second (and last) minor operation... actually it wasn't strictly an operation even la... of how Mummy covered my head with my blouse... of how I was actually crying under the shirt coz of the extremely painful injection... the injection was like the doctor was threading the needle round my erm...lump?... and how it was numb and I couldn't feel anything after that... except, as the doctor described, "like I'm tugging at your skin"...
I remember the time when I was 12 and I was staying in the children's section of Putra Hospital...=.= coz that time I was dehydrated and needed to stay for a few days, and only in the children's section could we have grownups to accompany and sleep with us... so I stayed there with toddlers, even though I was due to enter secondary school in a few weeks' time... =.= and how it was soooo boring and nauseating... and how I finished the 6th Harry Potter book in one morning... =.=|| and how Anna Doll (and Beany Bear?) visited me...
I remember the first time I obtained a big scar... by jumping down from the bus... then I got it on my knee...in standard 6...
I remember the second time I obtained....erm, big scarS... during PJ, when we were playing "eagle catch chicken"... then I fell down and hurt both my elbows...in form 2...
And of course the memorable time last year in april...when I was on the way to school... just walking, and then I fell down and the scar is still as large as life on my knee... =.= wei, 3 more months and it will be a year already!!! it's still so big and noticable!!! And... time really flies... O_O|||
And... 5th January 2008... somehow it seems very far away, but the details are still clear in my head......
And the first day I entered secondary school, Gail told me that there was a very smelly toilet in Block C...==...and the days before that, when Dawn said that I looked very cute in the uniform...
And the time (form 1) when my bag was confiscated by our form teacher coz people kept making me scream... =.=
I remember the horrible piano and theory exams... how I thought I would NEVER pass my Grade 8 theory exam and in the end ngam ngam passed without a single mark to spare O_O... and the most mafan Performer's Certificate exam, that required us to make a "programme" for the examiner... and needed us to time ourselves (dunno how many minutes for each song)... and look up all the information on each song... and how I struggled with Expression, and in the end slightly succeeded but now it's all gone again=.=... and how the examiner said Good Afternoon to me mummy and dawn when he met us outside the exam room... and how I thought I was very beautiful on that day =.=...and how the other candidate was so mature and dressed in leather... and how I cried when I found out I passed with merit... T_T
I remember PMR... how I had a horrible cold during the exams... how I sneezed in the exam hall...
I remember the "Dark Days" as I call them in my head... =.=|| 2009....
I remember the most touching day in school... 2009 End of Year Physics exam....
I remember last year... but I won't talk about it anymore...
I remember attending the Education Fair in Malacca...
I remember how I didn't want to go to Inti, I wanted to go to Nilai UC instead... :(
I remember Orientation... I remember my first friend in Inti... I remember my first dinner in Inti...
I remember the shoe game... my partner... how he seemed so tired after that and how embarrassed I was bcoz of that... and the husband-and-wife game... I didn't even look at my "husband"'s face so I'm sad to say that I dunno who he was to this day==...I just knew that he was wearing a light grey shirt and was quite big in size...
I remember how I was late for my first class, coz my watch+alarm clock+hp's time were all 10 minutes later than anyone else's...
I remember my first (and now best) friend in class, how I disliked her at first just because she looked a lot like someone else.......
I remember the awkward (first) days... how we didn't have anything to say...
I remember how I overslept on the first Sunday and therefore didn't go to church...and I was crying when I called Daddy...
I remember losing my appetite and weight during the first week, but putting it all back on since....

I remember so much...
When I was still a child, I really seriously thought that I would Never grow up...
But here I am, 18... ok fine 17 and 2 months....... Grown Up...

Sometimes I wish that I could go back in time, back to the time when I was still a toddler, with long hair... spoilt... stamping my foot every time... pointing my finger and screaming at people... being said quiet and good and cute by strangers........

But other times, I don't wish that. Coz I don't want to go through the growing process one more time... I don't want to feel the sadness and all the bad feelings once more...

I dunno what's the point of this blog post la... I just feel nostalgic, all of a sudden...

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