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Saturday, July 4, 2009

dreams

My mood is super un-good.
Just now I was daydreaming again...daydreaming that one day maybe I could go to the same uni as him...just so ngam ma...nt planned by myself de...
And maybe I would tell him b4 I went, and he would offer to bcum housemates with me...
And I would agree, and we would live 2gether everyday...
4 ppl in the house...2 boys 2 girls...
The other boy and the other girl fell in love with each other, and started a relationship...
And the 4 of us always go about 2gether...and while the other 2 pak tuo, me and him, the leftovers, will go about 2gether too...
Just like good good friends...
And maybe I will still be in love with him at that time...but he doesn't know...
And gradually, he falls in love with me...
And we will an lian each other...but we don't know...
And I will think that he likes another girl, and he will think I like another boy...
And one day he will behtahan and gao bai to me...and say "I know you don't like me, but I just couldn't tahan and wanted to tell you, sorry."
Then I will cry and say I've liked him since Form 3, and he will cry too...
And...and...and!!! Too beautiful for words...I'll just leave it to ur imagination!!

Ya...this is my dream...which I know will never come true...
I'm forever dreaming, and none of these ever comes true...
My life is thorougly unexpected...
Even the most normal things
For example, I will look forward to seeing him at tuition the next day, and it will end up that he doesn't come.
Or, I'm in a super bad mood, mad at the whole world, and I will suddenly see him and be happy.
Or, I will make up my mind to be super cool the whole day, and it ends up I'm the giggliest girl of the day.
Or, I look forward to seeing him at kokurikulum on Wednesday, but it turns out canceled.
These things don't happen once in a blue moon, they don't happen once a month, or a week.
They happen everyday!

Just now, I was dreaming again...of how he would accidentally offend me in msn...
And I would be angry with him, and very cool...
And then his friend would ask me, why am I angry with him?
And blah blah blah
But it turns out he's not even online.
And by the looks of it, he's not going to online for the rest of the night...
Coz by this time he's usually sleeping...
And when I'm typing this, I'm actually hoping that the opposite of what I think will happen, will happen again...
He will online....
But it won't, coz my actual thoughts are that he will online...
And he's not online now...

BIG SIGH

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