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Wednesday, February 25, 2009

why

I was doing my Physics homework that our teacher gave 2 weeks ago. So rajin hor?
I heard the opening and closing of the gate --- Daddy was back.
The door of my room opened.
"Hello, Daddy."
"Hello."
*pause*
"Mable ar...just now Pn Habibah's husband passed away."
"Oh. When?"
"Just now, just now only. I was at the house next to hers, fixing their computer and they told me. So I went over to her house."
"Oh. How did it happen?"
"He was playing badminton and when he was going home, he suddenly collapsed. When they sent him to the hospital, they couldn't save him."
"Oh."

What kind of cold-blooded animal is talking to my father? I still remember that I went to his house every Hari Raya when I was small. Even though my memory is completely empty of what he looks like, what he said etc., but still...all I could feel was sorriness for Pn Habibah's loss and shock. I didn't cry, I didn't even feel really sad.

The next day, I went with my schoolmates to her house. We went into her house in a line, to salam with her. When it was us Chinese girls' turn, she got up and hugged each of us in turn and started crying. This made a few of my classmates cry too, but I was dry-eyed.

Why? Why am I so stony-hearted? Can anybody tell me, why?

1 comment:

Strawberry Girl said...

Erm...im shocked wen i read ur post...and i did cry...but mayb it's becoz u never had a close relationship with P.H? and u'r not very emotionally attached gua? not to worry...u feel genuinely sorry inside and will pray4 her and that's all that matters...